Saturday, October 5, 2019

A Year Later

A year ago, I shared the tiniest morsel of my story. The moment I did, things changed. I wrote that 
I would be called into question, that I worried I'd be cut out of the lives of others. And it happened. My integrity was called into question as a result of last year's share. I was called sinful by some. I think it's easier to attack someone speaking out than to stomach the reality sometimes. Some were asked to cut me out of their lives as a result. Most followed suit. And it hurt, deeply. 

But so much good came from it as well.

I can't begin to say the number of people that reached out as a result with stories to share. One person reached out and said that they felt they had been the offender is the situation and shared how eye-opening it had been to read. Another sent me police evidence photos of where their situation ended up, and stated that it started just as mine had.

I decided to share as a result of hearing of the death of a woman in town that was killed by abusive spouse. It was Domestic Violence Awareness Month and I was moved to share my experience. The only intent was to reach someone who needed to hear it. Abuse doesn't have to be strictly physical. And as someone in a situation that felt like a gray area, I found myself making excuses and allowing unacceptable, damaging behavior. I hate to think of anyone else feeling the same way, keeping quiet and carrying that load alone.

Almost a year later, the losses that came as a result still break my heart. But if this cautionary tale has reached one person, then I'm grateful.


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